“Liar, liar pants on fire” and other phrases I taught my kids

I am a portable DVD player holdout. My family took long vacations every summer (Mom, Dad, 4 kids and a dog in the old station wagon with wood paneling) and I have fond memories of playing the license plate game, the alphabet game and getting to snack on normally-forbidden treats. I have some bad memories too - especially of my brother throwing up on me and the dog jumping out the window on the interstate.

But, my best memories are of my Mom reading to us. It was on these trips that I was exposed to Island of the Blue Dolphins, the Hardy Boys and Nancy Drew, Heidi, and the Bobsey Twins, among others. So, why do my kids need a DVD player in the car? I don’t think they do.

Unfortunately, I get carsick while reading so I recently went to the library on the eve of our 7-hour trek to Northern Georgia. There I found most of the audio books I wanted were checked out. Most notably, Mary Pope Osborne was nowhere to be found. The kind librarian suggested I try the Junie B. Jones series. The series had rave reviews from librarians, teachers and professional organizations so I decided it was a pretty good bet. Not so; my first clue should have been one of the titles - “Junie B. Jones and the Stupid, Smelly Bus.”

Junie B. is new kindergarten student and while the tales are absolutely hysterical the language is exactly how I DON”T want my kids to talk. For example, there is “Dumb Jim who I hate” and “William, the boy I think I can beat up” There is also a lot of sass by Junie B. to her parents, grandparents and teacher (named “Mrs” because Junie cannot remember her “dumb name”).

Well, my kids ate this up and have been mimicking the language by playing the Junie B. game. They take turns being Junie B. and crack themselves up with all of her ridiculous sayings.

But, yes, I am still a portable DVD player holdout. I failed to get my kids appropriate audio books but I still believe they are a much better form of technology to use in the car. Kids are exposed to stories that are above their reading level (if they read at all) and that are more complex than what can typically be read in one sitting at home. Kids also get to hone in their listening skills, learn new vocabulary, participate in family discussions about the book and hear the inflection in the voices of professional narrators –all things that can instill a love of reading. In addition, they get to use their imagination to visualize what characters and settings look like; essentially, they get to work their mind.

Since my recent failure at audio book selection, I have found a couple online resources other Moms may find interesting: Kids Read & Audio books for Free. I would love to hear about other sources that help Moms locate appropriate audio books.

As we begin to prepare for a driving trip from Florida to Pennsylvania I will search for audio books early and hope that “Liar, liar pants on fire” becomes a passing phase in our household.